5 Moment Makers with Your Kids

Do you ever feel like your day has flown by?  You think over your last 24 hours realizing you didn’t get done everything you need to do?  Then a little voice reminds you of all the bigger priorities you have overlooked.  You sigh and think “tomorrow”.

Over the years, with health issues, busyness of life and ministry opportunities, I am barely making it through the day sometimes.  Let alone, fulfilling all my top priorities and doing what I know God wants me to do.  Life just happens and often I am responding to some “emergency”.  My kids can be one of the priorities that get put on the “back burner”. Yes, I am feeding them, caring for their daily needs.  But my priority as a mom has been to feed their soul and tie their heartstrings to God.

My last months have been filled with doctor appointments, surgery, recovery and “self”.  Having cancer again has been a blessing, but also challenging again.  I find during this time, my kids can drift into the “abyss” of life.  Not only are they worried about me and withdrawing a bit, but their own life weighs heavy on their mind.  Starting high school, a new sport, losing a tooth and turning 13 are all “big” moments in my children’s lives in this season. 

How do I pull away from the stress of my season of life and focus? 

How do I keep my top priorities afloat when all around me is sinking?

As I sit and assess these questions, I realize, while right now is difficult, life has a way of always pulling me away from my top priorities.  I have to go back to the basics and think about how I can create “moments” with my kids.  I don’t want to just “spend time” with them.  I want to “create moments” with them.  Here are five ways I make those moments, steal those minutes and build bonding memories daily.

1.  Seize the Morning

If you house is anything like mine, everyone is going a different direction in the morning hours.  I have children going off to class, a husband leaving for work and others grumpy from a not-so-good sleep.  My first inclination is to attend to everyone’s physical needs – food, lunches, carpool, etc.  While this all needs to happen, I look for opportunities to love on them first thing – to grab a moment.  I climb into bed to gently wake a sleeping giant with hugs and kind words.  I hug them while they brush their teeth letting them know I believe in them.  I gather them early for a devotion at the breakfast table with a special meal. Or I simply walk them to the car with a prayer and a kiss.  Taking time and seizing the morning time sets us on a great course for the day.

2.  Snatch the First Impression

My dad had a habit of always smiling and catching his breath when he first would see me.  Whether I was coming home from school, getting up in the morning or seeing him for the first time that day, he would always have an incredible ability to make me feel like he had been waiting all day to see me.  I felt cherished and loved.  I learned as an adult my dad actually trained himself to do this.  What I saw as a devoted dad was really my dad making an effort to love me.  I can see his face etched in my mind smiling hello to me.  These are the pictures I want my kids to see of me.  So I learned this lesson from my dad - to pass on love to the next generation just remembering to be so excited to see them.

3.  Own the Inconvenient “Minute”

So often my children come to me wanting a minute of my time.  “Mommy, look at me!”  “Mom, can you come play?’  “Mommy, do you have a minute?”  I am busy doing something important on the computer, in the house or on the phone.  I miss the inconvenient minute that would become a “moment” in time.  Most of the time, my kids only really want a minute of my time, especially the little ones.  I can remember a time when my youngest son just wanted me to race a car with him.  It took all of two minutes to do what he wanted and then he was on this way.  Don’t reject these opportunities to create these little moments with your kids – own the inconvenience!

4.  Make Do with What You Have

I always feel like it has to be perfect.  Whatever it is.  This goes for making moments with my kids too.  I have learned during sickness to just grab the opportunity.  It may not look like I want it to, but it doesn’t matter.  I look at Jesus and some of his most profound moments were just doing daily life – eating, getting water, traveling.  Jesus used his opportunities where God put them.  In this season of life, I have been in bed a lot.  I have just invited my kids to join me there – in my recuperation.  Come do school, come read a book and come hang out with me was the message.  They don’t need to know it hurts and I have a headache.  They will just remember the special time together.

5.  Embrace the Nighttime Ritual

I am spent at the end of the day.  I just want them to go to bed at 7:00 like they did when they were 3.  Anyone else with me?  I know this is not what God wants from me.  I learned from Sally Clarkson that my kids will open up more at night than they do any other time of the day.  While it is easier to send the kids up to bed on their own now, I still take the time to put them to bed.  My goal each night is to have a “moment” with at least one of the kids.  I massage and tickle backs.  I crawl into beds and talk.  I sing and pray with them.  They ask questions and they tell me about their day and their dreams.  At this very challenging time of day for me, God blesses me with “moments” we will both remember.  So I encourage you to embrace the nighttime ritual as you seek to create time with your kids.

While I know I cannot do any – or all – of these things on my own accord, it is only through God’s strength and listening to the Holy Spirit that I can create “life-sustaining” moments with my kids.  I am too selfish, but God gives me the super-natural ability to be His hands, His feet and His hug to my kids.  In the midst of the hard times, I can rest in Him knowing He really does have it all under control.

How do you build “moments” with your kids into your life?

Jackie's Journey: Whose Spirit Is in Control?

Galatians 5:16 "Walk in the Spirit"

Which fruit of the Sprit do you manifest most?

Galatians 5:22-23
God's Spirit	The Destroyer's
Love	Self-first
Joy	Self-pity
Peace	Discord
Patience	Anger
Kindness	Rudeness
Goodness	Disobedience
Faith	Unbelief
Gentleness/Humility	Pride
Christ-control	Sin-control

Galatians 5:16 is a command…”(You) walk in the Spirit”. 

Ephesians 5:18 is also a command …“(You) be filled with the Spirit”.  

How would you characterize your walk with God?  

      Do you live in “up and down” defeat or consistent upward victory?

“God commands us to be filled with the Spirit; and if we aren’t filled, it’s because we are living beneath our privilege!”  (D.L. Moody)  It is important to God that we understand how to walk with Him, or He would not have given such direct and clear commands.  The understood “YOU” in these commands places the responsibility on us to do our part.  The provision to walk in the Spirit has been given.  We either have all of the fruit or none of the fruit of the spirit!  “Fruit” is singular”, not plural “fruits”. Gal. 5:22

We are making decisions continually in our daily walk through life.  Our choices determine our Christian walk.  The “What Now” or point of decision at the Y in the road is a moment-by-moment process.  We either choose the destroyer and sin and lead a defeated life, or we choose the fruit of the Spirit and the joyful Christian life, receiving all that is ours in Him. (Galatians 5:19-21)    

Our choice in that moment of decision determines our course and puts one of the two Spirits in control of us!  We cannot serve two masters! 

Whose Spirit has control of your life right this minute??

Years ago when considering the choice at the fork in the road of my Christian life,  my husband asked,

“Jackie, what is the purpose of joy?”

What?  What do you mean?...

 I thought it was a really good question and answered, “let me think about it a moment.”  Without that moment’s hesitation, he proceeded to go through each of the fruit with its purpose and to my amazement I found it gave new meaning to the command to maintain my “walk in the Spirit!!”

This is what I learned that day and continue to learn daily:

Love is for others first! “If we loved our neighbor as we love ourselves” we would have no need for any of the other fruit! (Gal.5: 14) But we don’t!

Joy is the reward for giving love away; the spontaneous enthusiasm of my spirit when my soul is obedient to God’s instruction. (Psa. 16:11)

Peace is the absence of turmoil; it maintains harmony with God and man.

Patience is what makes accepting a difficult situation from God without giving Him a deadline to remove it… doable! (Rom.5: 3-4)

Meekness   puts my energy under God’s control, when I yield my personal entitlements, rights and expectations to Him. (Psa. 62:5)  

Kindness is a gift to another to show the person’s worth. (Jn. 3:16)

Faith is the absence of doubt; facing fear and turning it into a God-given desire.  (Pro. 10:24)

Goodness is given so others can trust Him in us - His integrity and virtue.

Gentleness is magnified in the presence of pride.  It repels arrogance.

Christ-control is instant obedience to the initial promptings of God’s Spirit. (Gal. 5:24,25)

The absence of any of these in my daily walk is a signal to me.  If I am impatient, unkind, worried, fearful, and angry or in turmoil, I know I have made a wrong choice at the point of decision.  Somewhere I sacrificed my fellowship with God!  I go back, acknowledge my wrong response or decision, confess it by name and regain my peace and all the other fruit that comes with it!

How careful are you in your decision making process? 

Do you guard your responses?

 Little “decision-making” children are watching and learning!

The Day I Became a Princess

I'll never forget that moment frozen in time - the day I became a princess. Little girls dream about this their entire lives, and it was happening to me. I remember watching my television set as a little girl and seeing the crown placed upon the lucky contestant's head. It was magical to watch. Now, it was even more magical to experience.

I stood shaking with excitement trying to squat low enough for them to fasten the crown to my hair. Then suddenly it was on. I was crowned. I was a princess.

I remember the reporters and the flashbulbs. It almost seemed like a blur. I was officially a part of the Miss America program.

My local title meant that I would be traveling to compete in the Miss California pageant. There would be months of preparation ahead. Interview training, dress and swim suit fittings, voice lessons, and more! There was so much to do -- like graduate early from high school so I could make it to the pageant on time.

I was only seventeen. I had stars in my eyes. I had dreams in my head. What would it be like to win & get to be Miss America? What opportunities or doors would be open to me along the way? 

I had my eyes on the prize - a crown!

The Miss California pageant came and went - and I returned home with my same crown. Still a princess, but no new title. I got to enjoy another year of parades, opening days, and events - all dressed as a princess.

I remember the night I crowned my successor. I still got to keep my own crown - in a box at home. The crown no longer held the same meaning as it had on that first night. It no longer had a title tied to it. It didn't have the promise of the future I had dreamed of. 

Fast forward to today.

I have my own little princesses running around. They love looking at pictures of mommy with her fancy crown. I still haven't climbed up in the garage to pull out my old crown. Last time I looked in the box, it was pretty tarnished and dusty.

They say hindsight is 20/20. Wow, do I agree! 

Now, I realize that I am still pursuing a crown. However, the crown I'm after is not one that will ever grow old or tarnish. This crown is eternal and more valuable than any crown ever made (even the real crowns worn by real princesses).

My crown is in Christ! My eyes are on Him! As I watch my little ones dance around and giggle about wanting to be princesses someday, I remind myself that they already are. We are daughters of the one true King. He has a crown waiting for us in heaven. Now, I just have to be sure that I am not only keeping my eyes on that crown, but teaching my girls (and boys) to do the same.

"Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day..."

2 Timothy 4:8 

*See the video I made of our girls' princess party & how I used The Princess Parable's Book: Princess Joy's Birthday Blessing HERE!

Kristi Clover is homeschool mom of five blessings ranging from teens to tots. She spends most of her days watching over her "castle" and attending to the needs of her loyal subjects. She is married to her Prince Charming and resides in southern California. She records her royal adventure in motherhood at www.raisingclovers.com. You can also find her at YouTube, Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, Twitter, — & Periscope as @RaisingClovers!

Surreptitious Scorpion!

efore we arrived in Panama, we had seen the handiwork of the Kuna Indians and were amazed at their beautiful Mola creations. They would take the jungle and its inhabitants and meticulously sew them into intricate three layer tapestries.   We would soon discover the secrets of these pieces of art!  

Can you see the arthropods on this one?

A typical Kuna Mola

When challenged for tribal missions the unknowns were the most difficult to adjust to…and the unknowns were many and continual.  Honestly, there were more unknowns in our jungle life than I could ever have imagined while stateside…and trust me, I thought my fear had covered everything conceivable in preparation for our missionary service!

The word hope in the Bible is a term of certainty.  The Greek word translated “hope” in the New Testament is elpizo, which means,  “to anticipate with confident expectation.”  Uncertainty and the unknown are bedfellows!  They helped develop my capacity to be a woman of hope and not despair.

Arriving in the last frontier of Panama…the Darien Gap, I stepped over the threshold of our new home.  The Darien Gap is said to be one of the last wild frontiers in the world!

Had I not heard this before arriving??

It was dark and wet.  The mud-packed floor was cold!  Ralph had poured one cement floor in the house, but then realized it was not a viable option to do more considering the amount of weighty bags of cement that would have to be carried two days from Panama City by banana boat and, then, another day upriver by dugout to reach the shoreline of our village.

Kim, our youngest daughter, was a nursing baby when we first arrived. As the months rapidly slipped away from us, we knew she would soon be crawling.  Anticipating his daughter’s first attempts, her Dad found woodcutters from Colombia to carve a wood floor from the jungle.

He also brought in cats from Panama City to discourage the creepy crawlers, skittering mice, and flying bats in the house at night!  Kim loved the cats!  Right on cue, before the floor was finished, Kim began crawling and she was fast! She chased the cats and disappeared out of sight every chance she got!

Kim's friends

One morning her little friends were circling our bed in a very agitated manner.  Kim was as excited as the cats and crawling right behind them!  Swiftly snatching her up into my arms, I caught a glimpse of something large moving under the bed!  I was hoping it was a bird that had lost its way…

Not certain what had entered the house unaware, I instinctively picked up the biggest and heaviest object I had close at hand…Ralph’s size 14 combat boot!  With one fell swoop I smashed the largest scorpion I had ever seen.  Its crushed tail extended beyond the end of the boot!

Alertness is learning to foresee dangers and fully understand the consequences!  No problem here…I was on alert!

This, of course, includes creepy crawlers but also being alert to the dangers of our words, actions, attitudes, and thoughts!  My thoughts could never have visualized all the variables that became my almost daily occurrences.  Being alert to what was taking place around me was a practice that became inherent in our jungle life. 

Being watchful and prompt to meet danger or an emergency is the definition of alertness.  Learning to pay attention to the lessons God was teaching me through the experiences He was bringing my way were invaluable to my spiritual growth.  My anxiety, resistance and need to be “in control” often hindered His growing me up!

How alert are you?

Have those under your care experienced problems that should have been detected and corrected? 

Are you aware of opportunities God gives you to witness and encourage others to grow spiritually? 

What is the last problem you could have avoided by being alert to danger?

Five Times a Week

“All great change in America begins at the dinner table” – Ronald Reagan

As we start into the new school year, I begin to protect the family calendar.  More importantly, I have to guard our family dinnertime with all my might.  Every sport and kid activity desires to claim this precious tradition and rob my family of our time together.  The every day moments that make us “The Youngs” are on the line.  The opportunity to pour into my kids during this daily practice will change who they are.

When the kids were little, every meal was at the dinner table.  But as they grow older, our goal is always a minimum of 5 family dinners together.  This can be either sitting down in our home or out to dinner. Meaning, of course, no cell phones, iPad, TV or invited guests.  Dinner together involves my family together – eating, talking, praying, laughing and loving. 

Here are just a couple of benefits:

1.  Your kids will eat more vegetables and new foods that you introduce.  At our house, you are required to eat the vegetable on the table.  Whatever it is.  We started this in the beginning.  They don’t have to finish the starch or the meat, but the veggies?  Definitely!  My kids will only eat a new food at our dinner table.  At least, I can get them to try it!

2. Your kids will be more emotionally healthy.  Studies show kids who eat with their families at least 5 dinners a week are less likely to get depressed, think of suicide or develop an eating disorder.  84% of teens were quoted as saying they would rather eat with their family, but “don’t tell my parents”.

3.  Your kids will learn to say “no”.  Kids who dine with mom and dad regularly are less likely to take a chance smoking, drinking or using drugs.  Connecting with mom and dad on a regular basis gives them the parental engagement most kids are looking for.

4.  Your kids will do better in school.  Only 9% of kids who eat dinner with their families 5 times a week struggle in school compared to the whopping 40% of kids who don’t.  Studies also suggest talking with adults helps vocabulary and manners.

5.  Your kid’s heart will bond to yours.  If you go the extra mile, not just eating together, but conversing and laughing together, your kids won’t want to miss dinner.

What do we do?

Our family starts dinnertime at the preparation where at least two children are involved as part of their daily chores.  One child has the chore of setting the table and one child helps mom prepare.  We rotate day to day.  We get dinner ready and chop vegetables.  Most the kids are happy when there is a new recipe to surprise everyone with or if it is a favorite family meal.  When dinner is over, one child does the dishes so mom can have a break.

When we all sit down to dinner, we have a routine everyone can count on.  First, we wait for everyone to get their food.  Next, we pray and thank the Lord for the food and we bless it to our bodies.  Thirdly, kids eat quietly while mom and dad talk for about 5 minutes.  Honoring my husband this way is always appreciated.  As the kids have gotten older, the rule has gotten more difficult to keep.  Still, it is part of our dinnertime.

We try to make things fun!  We have a box of questions to use to create fun conversation.  Many of our guests request we ask these at dinner.  Also we do what is called “Pits and Peaks”.  Tell us one thing (or more) that went well today or where you saw God at work – PEAK.  Tell us one thing that didn’t go as planned or areas God might be growing you – PIT.  Drawing out my children and hearing about their day (even if I have been with them) is priceless.

So as I am filling in the calendar for the new year, I put in the soccer, tennis, ballet, AWANAs, speech & debate and youth group.  Remembering when will dinner be.  On some days, dinner will be at 5:30 p.m. so we can all get to church and other days it will be at 7:30 p.m. when everyone is home.  Flexibility is the key!  I know our pastor’s parents told us sometimes they waited until 9:00 p.m. when everyone was home.  The family that eats, prays and laughs together – stays together! 

Maybe Ronald Reagan is right.  By keeping this practice, we may change the face of America!

How are you keeping the family dinnertime sacred?

*Statistics from health.com

Jackie's Journey: First Impressions

A year or so after moving into the Darien Gap in the jungles of Panama, I was asked by our field leaders to jot down my first impressions. To my surprise I read my notes in our New Tribes Mission Brown Gold Magazine months later in May 1973.  A few days ago I was going through some photo albums and found the same article I had written.

The purpose of the writing was to call attention to the desperate need to reach these unreached people tucked into little corners all over the world.  H.A. Roberts said, “The toughest challenges lead to the greatest triumph’s”.  The call is as imperative now, as it ever was then.  Here is that quoted article reproduced:

“HERE WE ARE!  Address: El Rio Pucuro, Nowhereland!

Our village carved out of dense jungle.  My house has a tin roof in the foreground.

Only 26 days ago we flew into El Real in an eight-passenger plane and were picked up in the same dilapidated jeep that had met us 6 months before.  We headed to the waterfront, a short ride on a dusty, bumpy road that I viewed between my feet through the holes in the floorboard! 

We got as close as the jeep could go and then hobbled ¼ mile with 3 month-old Kim in my arms, 3 year-old Christina hanging on to my dress, three suit-cases, an infant seat to use in the floor of the dugout, and boiled water!

We traveled an hour to Yavisa for the night.  Next morning, at 5:00 a.m., we loaded the piraguas (dugout canoe) for Pucuro.  We ate fish and rice for breakfast and began our 11-hour trip upriver.

The winding river Pucuro!

ours passed and I couldn’t believe the beauty I was beholding.  The jungle is plush, full and spattered with green and yellow blankets of butterflies all along the way.  The first six hours were quick and, other than cramped arms and legs from protecting Kim from the beating sun and being sandwiched between our household belongings, we all fared well.  The last six hours were a real battle against our dry river and a swift current!  No less than twenty times Ralph and the others jumped into the shallow water to push us over rocks, etc. that worked like a barricade to delay our long awaited entrance into the land of the Kuna people.

Dry season means shallow waters!

Just before dark I looked up and saw brown bodies silhouetted along the sandy break in the jungle.  My heart began to pound as I realized I was about to face a people that had consumed our hearts and minds for over three years!

Would they accept us?

Would they grab my baby and run into the dark?

What should I expect?

The verse “My grace is sufficient…” flooded my mind as I yielded to His wooing and relaxed!

As we pulled into shore at 6:30 p.m. the people swarmed all over us.  Somebody took Kim out of my arms and stepped away into the dark.  In the confusion Christina lost her shoe and I felt Ralph tug on my arm to head up the bank to our house.  I called in the dark for Kimi and somebody laid her in my arms while the others laughed.

As we meandered up a narrow, overgrown path to glimpse our jungle house, all I could hear was little Christina in her Daddy’s arms asking for her lost shoe!   

Oh, for the simple trust of a child! 

In a few moments we stepped into our new home.  The dirt floor was cold, mainly because I was wet from our trip in, but too, it was dark and the river had filled the air with moisture.  The following morning I opened my eyes to what looked like a storehouse with boxes, tanks, mosquito netting, etc.  Soon we were busy greeting people, finding suitcases with dry clothes, and hunting through canned goods and paper sacks for food to eat.

Now, 26 days later, I’m looking back to the first “Congreso” where I drank my first Indian “chicha” from communal cups, the first days of helping women sweep the village where I obtained my four blisters on one hand, the initial jolt of a hairy tarantula spider on my laundered sheet, the adjustment to the intense curiosity of the people, the initiation of washing clothes in the river, the perpetual problem of children urinating in our house, and the mixed emotions of a protective mother.

This evening, less than a month interior, we find ourselves with tape recorder in hand and a house full of Indians, struggling again to communicate the precious Gospel of Jesus with these still in heathen darkness.

New Tribes Missionaries 1971-1984

Will you pray for tribal missionaries?

Will you pray for the many still unreached tribes?

When Princesses Grow Up...

"The Spirit itself bears witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God: And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ..."   Romans 8:16,17

Some day your princesses will grow up . . .

I have two daughters. They came out of womb with the notion they were born for royalty.  No one told them this.  At about 18 months, my oldest daughter started to gravitate to everything pink and fluffy.  Before she ever saw a Disney princess or wore a costume, she put left over fabric around her and danced around saying, “Look at me mommy! I’m a princess!”

When they were little, my girls used to dress up in the most frilly, sparkly princess dresses and twirl around.  Nothing was too pink or too glittery to ever wear.  They would change their girly outfits from our well-stocked “dress up” box every hour.  Setting up tea parties, make believe lands and fashion shows were a daily occurrence.  Every once in a while, they would even try to put an outfit on their brothers.  This was regular life in the home of princesses.

I believe each of us is born a princess.  God made us to be a daughter of the King.  It is innate.  Before we ever see a Disney movie or a picture of Cinderella, our girls know they are made for greatness.  God has given them this gift of a purpose and a plan on this earth – our royal heritage. 

What a huge blessing and privilege it has been for our family to be given the stewardship of the Princess Parables ministry.  My girls were eight and five when the books first came out, and they couldn’t wait to dress up and help mommy at the booth.  But times change and our girls grow up!

In the last couple of months, my almost thirteen year old has decided being a princess is not for her.  She is maturing and likes to wear jeans with plaid shirts and Converse tennis shoes instead of lace and frills.  She wants a modern bedroom, not a princess bedroom.  She has asked to not dress as a princess at the conventions anymore and not have her identity be “a princess”.

While this was a huge blow to me and it has taken me a while to get used to, I can see God at work.  Even though it is our family ministry, my daughter can take on other jobs of service, and she doesn’t have to “dress up” anymore.  We are still working on her role exactly, but she does need to grow and figure out who she is.  And more importantly, who she is in Christ!  I need to keep my relationship with her whole because she is my heart and my love.

She will always be a princess on the inside.  She is a daughter of the true King and is created for greatness. God has His perfect plan for her.  She is still gracious, loving, kind, willing to serve, excellent in character and poised - even if she doesn’t wear a crown.  I am so grateful for the many years we have had this experience together.  I just honestly never saw the end coming.  I didn’t know one day it would be “her last” day to “dress up” at a convention.  Luckily for my heart, I still have one daughter (for the time being) who likes the Princess Parables.

So last weekend, I listened to my girls and we remodeled their “Princess” Bedroom.  Gone are the pink and purple walls. Here instead is a contemporary gray and turquoise palette. We have removed the case of porcelain dolls and tucked away the American Girl Dolls.  The princess beds have been traded for modern white ones.  And a sleek white IKEA desk has taken the place of stuffed animals and toys.  

As much as I would have liked them to stay little and be princesses forever, it is just not God’s plan.  I love the women they are becoming and the friends they are to me.  Yes, we have our “moments” in these young adult years, but they are a growing time for all of us.  I can’t wait to see all God has planned for their lives.

My advice to you moms of young princesses:  ENJOY!  If your girl wants to wear her princess dress to the grocery store, let her.  If they invite you to a tea party, go! I wish I had more often.  Take lots of pictures.  I realize now in the many of the “normal” moments of life, I never took pictures.  Some day, it will be their “last” and they will not stand up and announce it.  Enjoy every moment!

I am going to miss the frilly dresses, pink frosting and glitter everywhere, for certain, but I welcome these new grown up young ladies God has blessed me with!  It is a new season!

 I guess I will just have to wait for grand baby princesses to spoil!

Jackie's Journey: Final Farewell??

Kim, my companion, in those last days!

“On my bed I remember you; I think of you through the watches of the night.  Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.”

Psalm 63: 6,7,8. 

The Darien is an earthy, steamy environment of thick rainforest.  The humidity was thick enough to slice and the heat was barely bearable.  With our return to Pucuro after my surgery came the responsibilities that we had left three months prior.  Our partners, Jay and Sue Gunsteens and their family, had gone on furlough and returned to the States. My strength had not returned and I tired very easily.  I started resting in the afternoon and within a few months I was having difficulty getting up. 

Ralph had fastened a battery tape recorder to the wall above the bed so I could listen to the Book of Psalms.  They brought me great comfort as I listened to David in his distress and God’s continual deliverance.  God became my refuge and consolation in ways I had never experienced before.  The isolation from civilization, the absence of medical convenience and the sense I was dying was exchanged for finding Him more than enough to meet all my apprehension.

How does God meet you in a tight spot?

 The daily opening of the clinic, delivering of babies in the night, homeschooling Christina, the care of Kimberly, the linguistic work and the daily opportunity to share Christ… all brought profound joy.  In spite of my physical state, my circumstances brought life-lessons I would never have recognized, experienced or understood apart from this plan God had for me.

“If you have raced with men on foot and they have worn you out, how can you compete with horses?  If you stumble in safe country, how will you manage in the thickets by the Jordan?

Jeremiah 12: 5; Proverbs 24:10

We kept thinking if we could just persevere a few more months we would see our Kuna family in a spiritual place where we were comfortable leaving for an extended furlough and seek medical help.  We did not want both missionary families among our tribe to be on furlough at the same time.

The people would come and sit with me as I lay in bed.  Nangel, the village midwife, grandma, and precious new Christian, came daily and I looked forward to her visit.  One day she kept saying to the other women in our bedroom, “Purkwis tani!”.  Usually, that phrase is reserved for those who are dying.  It is translated, “Death comes!”  I remember thinking…it had been over a year since the surgery and I must look bad!  As a young mother, death seemed illusive, an impossibility…until my health failed and God began to speak to me gently, resolutely and unmistakably through His Word…

Did Nangel see something I couldn’t? 

A few weeks later a couple on the field committee, Don and Pat Barger, came in by plane for a day visit. The look on their faces when they entered our home told me that what Nangel had said might be true!  They immediately encouraged us to leave the village with them and to take an early furlough and get medical help in the States.  I had one small round mirror interior, and I had watched my face become thin and gaunt over the months, but I did not realize how tiny I was all over!

Waiting in Panama City for our flight to the States

I will forever be grateful for their divine intervention in our lives that day.  After a few days and friendly persuasion, we packed a few things, said our good-byes and headed to Scripps Diagnostic Hospital in the States.

As the plane lifted into the sky, I caught a glimpse of the entire village waving to us in what could have been our final farewell. 

Do you hear His voice daily speaking to you through Scripture?

Gently?  Resolutely?  Unmistakably? 

Are you listening?

Are You a Fun Mom?

I think I used to be fun a very long time ago, maybe before I was a mom. One of the reasons my husband married me in the first place was because he says I am fun (that was his #1 reason).  But as the years progressed and we had more kids, I changed.  My hormones were up and down. I slept less and took on more stress. I don't think I am fun anymore. 

With the kids, I often feel like the referee, the teacher, the cook, the maid, and the taxi.  Somehow it drains all the FUN out of me!

But I want to be a fun mom!  I always have wanted that . . .

After cancer, my attitude has been transformed.  I take each day that God has given me. I don't wait for the “next time” or when things might be “perfect”.  I just dive in because today might be my last.  Today might be your last. 

You just never know God's plans for you.  I think it is sad that it took cancer to get me back to being a more in-the-moment kind of mom.  One thing, I am no longer a bystander.  I now do so many more things than I used to, instead of just sitting around and watching others do them.

For instance, our Bible Study group, Elements, heads down to the beach each Tuesday with all our kids.  Each week I coax the ladies I am with into the ocean with me for a half hour.  One of them has not been in the ocean for 15 years!  We take in the waves, talk and shiver in the chilly Pacific waters.  I feel rejuvenated and refreshed. Today I asked the girls how old they felt jumping over the waves.  "12", one of them said.  Ah, we are living life! 

Now there are a bunch of health benefits to going in the ocean every week, which I just have to mention here.

First, the minerals in the sea air decrease stress and increase a sense of well-being.  Salt in water preserves the melatonin, tryptamine and serotonin levels in your brain.  This helps with fighting off depression or improving your sense of well-being. Going in the ocean water with your back to the breaking waves is like a reset of your emotional state.

Second, studies indicate that the minerals contained in the ocean’s water help with arthritis, psoriasis and even depression.  Other skin diseases, such as rosacea, eczema and rashes from plant allergies or heat are positively affected by the ocean water.  We decided today that we felt our skin was softer from our once-a-week plunges.

Third, ocean water contains iodine, which boosts thyroid function and improves the immune system.  When you are in seawater, the amount of oxygen carried throughout your bloodstream is improved and more nutrients are carried through your bloodstream to fight off free radicals. Ocean water also improves circulation of blood to organs.

Next, the swells and currents in the water act as a lymphatic massage to your whole body.  Being in the ocean water for a half hour is just like paying $80 for an expensive spa lymph massage.  Only God could know what our bodies need and provide a free alternative for our health.

Lastly, air particles break apart releasing ions into the atmosphere when the waves break.  Some scientists claim that sea air contains an abundance of negatively charged ions. These Ions are so good for us! In today’s society, we have too many positive ions in our lives.  You may know positive ions by another name – free radicals.  Because electricity, computers, TV and electronics are all sources of positive ions, it is easy to see why we have a shortage of negative ions.  Increasing our exposure to negative ions has many health benefits including enhancing the immune system, increasing alertness and improving concentration.  The negative ions from the ocean also help to reset your immune system and give you energy.

The biggest benefit is that my kids come and hang out with me in the water.  At least my girls do. So I am writing this for all the moms out there who want to stay in your beach chair this summer (like I have done so many years in a row!).  I had many excuses - I didn't want to get wet, it was too cold, I didn't want to have anyone see my overweight body, I didn't want to have to shower . . .  and so on.  JUST DO IT!  Whatever it is, experience God's creation with your kids!  Get in the ocean, the river, the lake - take that hike, jump in the pool with your kids . . . experience life!  This one life God has given you!  You never know when it will change - your kids will grow, your health may deteriorate - do it now before it's too late! 

The fun mommy in all of us is just waiting to come out. You never know – you might get healthier while you're at it!  Come join me this summer  . . . your kids, and probably your husband, will love it! Just picture our God in heaven smiling down watching you enjoy the things He made for you!  What could be better?

You shall go out in JOY and be led forth in PEACE"  Is 55:12

Jackie's Journey: Inexplicable Agony Part 2

“When God wants to bring more power into your life, He brings more pressure.” (A.B. Simpson)

My husband’s increasing pain with no resolve had become a constant pre-occupation.  Pressure, by definition, is a continuing opportunity for others to observe our true character.

“For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, works for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.” II Corinthians 4: 17

Our appointment at the Center for Disease Control was early, and to get into the lab, we needed to walk past a zoo-like structure that enclosed a number of caged odiferous monkeys. 

They were loud and aggressive as we made our way to the foyer.

We were greeted by two of the staff that led us down a long corridor to a small room with jars of unspeakable contents lining the counters.  After a series of tests and reviewing the hospital reports, these research doctors, who had been so kind to us, both had smiles of success on their faces. 

“As incredible as this may seem, Ralph”, they started their explanation, “somehow, you have broken into a cycle only seen in animals, specifically horses.  You have strongyloides, a parasite that burrows into the intestinal wall… and eats it!  The reason the Coca-Cola gave you relief is because the parasite would not burrow its head in those few moments because they feed on sugar.  So you were able to sense a temporary relief. This particular parasite is literally eating your intestinal wall!!” 

Looking for a source of entry, one doctor asked to see Ralph’s feet.  Ralph’s heels were deeply cracked and the parasite had entered into his system directly from the contaminated soil in the Choco settlement he had recently visited!  As interested as Ralph was in the entire explanation, all he really wanted to know was “how do we kill the creatures?!” 

The good news was that there was a treatment…but…it was for horses!  The bad news was they did not know if it would work on a human…or kill him instead?!  They were very careful to explain that under no circumstances was he to take more than one teaspoon a day because the medicine was so toxic. 

We needed to stay in Panama City another week for them to run a last test to see if the medicine had worked.  After three days and no relief, Ralph looked at the girls, and me, and said,  “It’s me or the bugs!”  He, instantly, took the bottle, turned it upside down, emptying its entirety into his mouth!  My heart started pounding…

Who does that???

He seemed fine for the first hour or so, and I breathed a sigh of relief.  Then, abruptly, he became agitated and turned into the Hulk!  He grabbed my arm and yelled something unintelligible.  His wild eyes looked like the man who had broken into the house a few days earlier! 

 What had he done?!

This strong, gentle man had become forceful and alarming.

Fortunately, we were still in the city, but it was too late to call the doctors.  When morning broke we loaded into the borrowed vehicle and headed back to the lab to see if Ralph had done something irreparable!  He, however, was excited to let the doctors know that the massive dosage of the toxic vial had made him a crazy man …but not killed him.  The real issue: Did it kill the parasites?!  

“Who can speak and have it happen if the Lord has not decreed it?  Is it not from the mouth of the Most High that both calamities and good things come?  Why should any living man complain…”  Lamentations 3: 37-39

Needless to say, the doctors were horrified and shocked that he had taken the whole bottle, but were grateful that he had survived!  They were anxious to test him for the parasite.   We sat silently waiting for the test results.  If the parasites lived through the toxic exposure, there was no other treatment known to help us.

They quietly re-entered the room …gleaming!

Ralph had lived… and the bugs had died!!

During those days of excruciating pain, never once did Ralph complain.  He was not suffering…just ask him!   He gave thanks continually and even at his worst, submitted to the will of God.

“The fear of the Lord leads to life, and whoever has it rests satisfied; he will not be visited by harm” Psalm 19: 23 

Pressure is the great tester of our spiritual condition…  “The greatness of a man’s power is the measure of his surrender.”  (William Booth) 

How do you respond to pressure?